The Ghost of Halloween Past

October 31, 2014:

Sitting on the couch, listening to the rain, waiting for my sleeping beauties to wake up so we can watch It’s the Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown before eating English muffin pizzas and heading over to the neighbor’s house for a pre-trick or treating party.

October 31, 1998:

 

You might say, “She looks lit up like a Jack o’ Lantern.” You might ask, “Why is she posting a picture where she looks lit up like a Jack o’ Lantern?”

Well first off, that’s my friend Natalie and she looks great. We can all agree on that.

Even though I don’t, I still like this picture. Because when I pass it through my present-day mommy filter of Would I show this to my kids? the answer is yes. Because I was 20 years old, half-way to my degrees in journalism and creative writing, and we made those costumes by hand.

I also love this picture for the very simple reason that the girl in black is someone I used to know. She does not exist anymore. She has changed and rebooted and become this responsible homeowner, career woman, mother of two sweet angels-slash-future presidents. A girl who used to put so much time and energy into not caring turned into someone who cares so much it keeps her up at night.

I love this picture because it is a time capsule of my very own life. A bright, sudsy spot on my own time-space continuum.

I didn’t grow up in a household where education was valued as much as it is in my home now. I filled out the FAFSA form myself. I stumbled through college with zero guidance.

But I wrote the entire way through. I wrote poetry, slam poetry, personal essays, short fiction and articles for the student newspaper.

I didn’t realize it at the time, but it saved me.

I also love this picture for that very statement: I didn’t know it at the time. 

Jack o’ Lantern or no (I’ll never tell), I’m proud of who this girl was and who she is now. Because a light that flickers is still a light. And mine is now very, very bright.